Online Dating While Bi & Black

"Hello my little Mocha Chocalata ya ya. Are you into guys or girls more?"  If you're like me, or millions of other people in the 21st century, you've tried your hand at online dating. While I'm sure that it's worked for plenty of people (and I know, by observation, that it has), I have a bit …

Dear Doubter of My Desired Degree

Dear Doubter of My Desired Degree, You aren't the first to tell me that there is no place in the world for English majors. During my Freshman year of college, I spoke to my then-history professor about my ideal career and college goals. Upon learning that I wanted to declare a major in English, the …

To The Matriarchs I’ll Never Meet

To the ones who came before me, I honor your resilience. I think of the thousands of women who came before me, beating the odds and choosing to continue on when the moments were too much to bear. My heart breaks when I think about all of the abuse and turmoil you were forced to live …

She

In the moments when She Looked to the brilliant violet sky Searching to find replacements For the stars snatched from her eyes And Crushed in the center of a powerful Palm She; Consistently hardening In a world that denies her softness Accusations of submissiveness Torn between Aggression and Servitude She; Earning space Both invisible and Not invisble enough. …

What’s In A Name?

When Naja's super-logical-brain desperately needs to categorize everything, including her own social standing. Over the course of the development of this blog, the concept of identity has come up quite often. From my ethnicity and race, to my speech and ideology, my identity has played a huge role in who I am. It's in my nature to …

What It Means To Let Go

Getting over temporary people is definitely a learning process... As I've probably mentioned in previous posts, my parents are divorced and have been for over a decade. As I've also stated, witnessing divorce can take a major toll on how you evaluate the relationships in your life. People coming and going through life's revolving door …

Stop The Slave Narrative

No more "all my life I had to fight." There are other stories to tell. I don't ever remember having fantasies about being a princess as a child. Maybe my parents could give a better testimony of my likes, but based on what I remember, I was more into being a Powerpuff Girl or a …

How “When” Became “If”

Please stop asking me about my love life. It hasn't changed. I know I've been more active on this blog in the last few days than I have been in the past month, but as school gets closer, my thoughts tend to run a little wild. Lately, I've had this habit of psychoanalyzing myself just …

What If?

"I'll have all of my goals accomplished in x amount of years," you say, as Depression gives a hearty chuckle at your expense. If I were to ask a 13-year-old version of myself what she thought I'd be like in 8 years, I already know exactly what she'd say, "She'll be skinny, with expensive clothes, a …

The “Oreo” Experience

  If a black girl listens to The Civil Wars, and no one's around to see it, is she still black? Yes. Surprise! Before I go into my story of asshole-ish behavior, I will say that there’s nothing more obnoxious than telling a black person that they’re not really black because of the way they speak …